Am I an Asshole? Or Am I Just Overstimulated?
There I was—half-dressed, holding a cup of lukewarm coffee, covered in oatmeal bits and existential dread—when I asked myself the million-dollar question: Am I an asshole… or am I just overstimulated?
Turns out, it’s the latter. But damn, it’s hard to tell the difference when everyone in your house is breathing too loud and touching you like you’re a human jungle gym.
Motherhood.
A beautiful, chaotic, overstimulating rollercoaster ride with no seatbelt and questionable snack breaks. And yet, we keep showing up—loving, feeding, fixing, folding… and then snapping over a toy in the floor like we just stepped on a landmine.
Sound familiar?
Yeah, you’re not crazy. You’re just cooked.
Here’s the truth: You’re not a bad mom. You’re a maxed-out, sensory-overloaded goddess trying to do it all with a smile.
So what’s a hot mom to do when the world feels too loud, too much, and way too touchy?
You take a timeout.
Yes, you—at your big grown age with bills and taxes—need a toddler-style reset.
Ten minutes in a quiet room, deep breaths, maybe a sip of something warm that isn’t microwaved six times. You’re not walking away from your family—you’re walking toward your sanity.
Then, get real about your triggers. Is it the noise? The mess? The 42 questions before 9 a.m.? Whatever it is, name it, claim it, and then create space between you and it. Headphones. Boundaries. A locked bathroom door and the sacred silence of pretending not to hear them call “Mom” for the 67th time.
And let’s talk grace—the kind you give your toddler when they lose it over the tag in their shirt that feels funny. You don’t call them a monster. You hand them a snack and let them feel their feels. So why can’t you give yourself the same love?
Take the nap. Eat the snack. Hide in the pantry. Nobody’s judging you here.
And for the love of the Good Lord, fill your cup FIRST. I’m not saying book a spa day in St. Lucia (unless you can, in which case, PLEASE invite me). I’m talking five minutes to journal, stretch, scream into a pillow, or just sit in the car scrolling memes in peace. Because when you feel good, you mother better.
As David Ruffin said: “Ain’t nobody coming to see you, Otis.”
YOU are the show, hot mom. The main character. And a burnt-out star can’t shine.
So no, you’re not an asshole. You’re overstimulated. You’re human. And you’re not alone.
Take your time. Take your space. Take care of you.
Because you deserve to feel good, too.
Need a little more support on your wellness journey? Come hang with me at hotmomwellness.com—your digital sanctuary for real, raw, and relatable wellness advice, straight from your favorite health coach, yours truly, Coach Joi.
